Ten Thoughts on Whole Living

1. Don't rush. Savor the ripest, sweetest season.

2. Discover peace by observing the world around you. Take time to drink it all in.

3. Learn from your setbacks and they will open the door to new opportunities.

4. Be earth-friendly by treading lightly when you travel.

5. Suprise yourself. Engage in a spontaneous act.

6. If you listen to your body, you'll feed it well and take the guilt out of eating.

7. When you push the boundaries of your strength, you tap into the body's true power.

8. The most memorable moments in life are often unplanned.

9. Eat close to the source. The healthiest food doesn't come in a wrapper.

10. To-do lists have their uses, but don't let them eclipse the serendipity in your life.

This Is Our Victory America

"Hello, Chicago.
If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.
It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen, by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different, that their voices could be that difference.
It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled. Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been just a collection of individuals or a collection of red states and blue states.
We are, and always will be, the United States of America.
It's the answer that led those who've been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day. Watch Obama's speech in its entirety »
It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this date in this election at this defining moment change has come to America.
A little bit earlier this evening, I received an extraordinarily gracious call from Sen. McCain.
Sen. McCain fought long and hard in this campaign. And he's fought even longer and harder for the country that he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine. We are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader.
I congratulate him; I congratulate Gov. Palin for all that they've achieved. And I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.
I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart, and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on the train home to Delaware, the vice president-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.
And I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years the rock of our family, the love of my life, the nation's next first lady Michelle Obama.
Sasha and Malia I love you both more than you can imagine. And you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the new White House.
And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother's watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight. I know that my debt to them is beyond measure.
To my sister Maya, my sister Alma, all my other brothers and sisters, thank you so much for all the support that you've given me. I am grateful to them.
And to my campaign manager, David Plouffe, the unsung hero of this campaign, who built the best -- the best political campaign, I think, in the history of the United States of America.
To my chief strategist David Axelrod who's been a partner with me every step of the way.
To the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done.
But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to. It belongs to you. It belongs to you.
I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington. It began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston. It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause.
It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep.
It drew strength from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on doors of perfect strangers, and from the millions of Americans who volunteered and organized and proved that more than two centuries later a government of the people, by the people, and for the people has not perished from the Earth.
This is your victory.
And I know you didn't do this just to win an election. And I know you didn't do it for me.
You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime -- two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century.
Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us.
There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after the children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage or pay their doctors' bills or save enough for their child's college education.
There's new energy to harness, new jobs to be created, new schools to build, and threats to meet, alliances to repair.
The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even in one term. But, America, I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there.
I promise you, we as a people will get there.
There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as president. And we know the government can't solve every problem.
But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And, above all, I will ask you to join in the work of remaking this nation, the only way it's been done in America for 221 years -- block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.
What began 21 months ago in the depths of winter cannot end on this autumn night.
This victory alone is not the change we seek. It is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were.
It can't happen without you, without a new spirit of service, a new spirit of sacrifice.
So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves but each other.
Let us remember that, if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers.
In this country, we rise or fall as one nation, as one people. Let's resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long.
Let's remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House, a party founded on the values of self-reliance and individual liberty and national unity.
Those are values that we all share. And while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress.
As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection.
And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn, I may not have won your vote tonight, but I hear your voices. I need your help. And I will be your president, too.
And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces, to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of the world, our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand.
To those -- to those who would tear the world down: We will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security: We support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright: Tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope.
That's the true genius of America: that America can change. Our union can be perfected. What we've already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.
This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight's about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing: Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.
She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons -- because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.
And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America -- the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.
At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.
When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs, a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.
When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.
She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that "We Shall Overcome." Yes we can.
A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination.
And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change.
Yes we can.
America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves -- if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?
This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment.
This is our time, to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth, that, out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubts and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people: Yes, we can.
Thank you. God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America."

"What is it exactly that the vice president does all day?" -Sarah Palin

"America, we cannot turn back. Not with so much work to be done. Not with so many children to educate, and so many veterans to care for. Not with an economy to fix and cities to rebuild and farms to save. Not with so many families to protect and so many lives to mend. America, we cannot turn back. We cannot walk alone. At this moment, in this election, we must pledge once more to march into the future. Let us keep that promise -- that American promise -- and in the words of Scripture hold firmly, without wavering, to the hope that we confess."

~Barack Obama DNC Acceptance Speech 08/28/2008

...and in latest news:

McCain, to Counter Age Problem, Picks Chinese Gymnast as VP!

“NOT ONLY WILL THIS HELP COUNTER OBAMA’S APPEAL TO YOUNG PEOPLE, BUT I NEED SOMEONE WHO CAN DO A DOUBLE TWIST PIROUETTE AS WELL AS I CAN.”

and

GOP to Counter Michelle Obama With Cindy McCain's Childhood 'Hardships'

“MY FATHER HAD TO GET UP AN HOUR EARLY EVERY DAY, JUST TO GET HIS PLANE READY TO FLY ACROSS OUR PROPERTY IN ORDER TO GIVE MY MOTHER A KISS.”

-Late Night Snark to Cap A Quiet Week-

"Michelle Obama said she's been in love with Barack ever since he took her on their first date and bought her ice cream. Isn't that sweet? Meanwhile, John McCain's wife Cindy says she's been in love with McCain ever since he hit her over the head with a club and dragged her back to his cave." -Conan O'Brien -

"And now comes proof that McCain has learned to use a computer, because evidently, he has plagiarized from the internets. Congressional Quarterly reported this week that John McCain may have copied some facts in a recent speech on the Georgian crisis from Wikipedia. I think it should have been obvious when he referred to the country's leader as 'President 404 Error: File Not Found.'" -Stephen Colbert -

"Obama chose Joe Biden as his running mate. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi praised Biden, calling him the "full package." Now he’s getting phone calls from Senator Larry Craig.

-Jay Leno -

"[Michelle Obama] must prove she loves America. As opposed to Republicans, who everyone knows love America...they just hate half the people living in it." -Jon Stewart -

"McCain and Obama are, as you probably know, ideologically speaking, they are completely different nominees. For example, one offers you hope, and the other offers you a dish of hard candy." -David Letterman -

"The night’s big event was Obama’s speech, in front of 75,000 enthusiastic supporters and eight confused Broncos season ticket holders." -Jimmy Kimmel -

Gracie Jenkins 08/21/08

Who knows who I might have become

If you had never been there to guide me...

If I had never received your love.

I strive to live the example that you lead

You always know the answers to everything I need.

and I, wanna be like you....

I wanna emulate your spirit and your grace.

you're my angel

my angel

You say..that our roles have reversed

But I dont feel any different since I was little girl

You dont realize how much you take care of me

It's like you whisper words of wisdom into my daily routine

and i, wanna be like you....

I am constantly amazed by your strength.

you're my angel

my angel

I know..that you were ready to go

You wanted be back with your husband..

You wanted to go home.

I'll never be ready for you to be gone

But he takes you when he needs you

and life will some how go on.

and i'll always love you...

whether on this earth or from heaven above

you're my angel

my angel

you're my angel.

This is to my great grandmother who passed away last week. I'll miss you maw.

Love,

~Kailani

Get Lost

Frozen drinks with little umbrellas have their place - usually involving a white-sand beach. But when inveterate wanderer Hans Christian Andersen wrote "To roam the roads of lands remote, to travel is to live," he didn't mean cruise ships and high-walled resorts. Vacations are nice, but they're not the same thing as traveling: wandering through marketplaces, sampling food of indeterminate origin, and, most important, meeting new people. It's an old-fashioned but effective way to remind us that we're all in this together. Certainly, we would all be better off right now if a few people in the Pentagon had spent a little more time drinking tea with locals in Iraq.
This doesn't require a transcontinental flight - a New Yorker could learn as much from a trip to Kansas as to India. All we require is a willingness to break out of the bubbles most of us live in, to be shocked and moved and a little bit scared. Don't worry, you can grab that umbrella drink next time.
Until next time,
~Kailani

Acades Vulgaris

“The path to our destination is not always a straight one. We go down the wrong road, we get lost, we turn back. Maybe it doesn’t matter which road we embark on. Maybe what matters is that we embark.”~ Barbara Hall

-Acute Thespian Syndrome? (patient faking illness; MGM syndrome)

-Chrome Induced Ischaemia? (patient that develops inexplicable chest pains when arrested and handcuffed)

Frolicking amongst coffin dodgers and the chance to perform a full body physical on a double whopper with cheese? (Obese female with gential thrush)

But why? You may ask.

"Throw away all ambition beyond that of doing the day’s work well. The travelers on the road to success live in the present, heedless of taking thought for the morrow. Live neither in the past nor in the future, but let each day’s work absorb your entire energies, and satisfy your wildest ambition.”~ William Osler

Yes ladies and gents, it's that time of year again. The time when Kailani begins contemplating on the existence of both chocolate hostages (poo's that just won't come out) and her future as a possible physician.

“Of course there is no formula for success except perhaps an unconditional acceptance of life and what it brings.”~ Arthur Rubinstein

So, here I am in dire need of your opinion and here's a little recital of my indecisiveness to influence your vote:

Since my days as baby goat I can remember wanting to be a doctor. I've changed my major quite a few times post-playground/pre-present and everytime I land back on none other than pre-med.
My fears before have been...of the math classes and the chemistry classes. Well, this past semester I took a math class and passed with flying colors (unlike I've ever been able to do before), I've actually been doing better in my math and science classes than the classes involving writing (which I had always thought was my strength, therefore prompting me to leave my dreams of medicine behind and pursue "other" majors (ha ha those of you that know me are laughing now...english, education, electronic media comm., journalism, business...). Now here I am again at the end of another semester feeling that I'm not going to be successful without an unbridled enthusiasm for something that I really love...I love the idea of going to medical school. I always have...and now with those fears of maths and science silenced (as much as they can be) I feel that maybe I have what it takes to do it.

But I found a quote pertaining to this...very interesting:

"Medical students are further softened up by being maliciously fatigued. The way to weaken a person’s will in order to mold him to suit your purposes is to make him work hard, especially at night, and never give him a chance to recover. You teach the rat to race. The result is a person too weak to resist the most debilitating instrument medical school uses on its students: fear.If I had to characterize doctors, I would say their major psychological attribute is fear. They have a drive to achieve security-plus that’s never satisfied because of all the fear that’s drummed into them in medical school: fear of failure, fear of missing a diagnosis, fear of malpractice, fear of remarks by their peers, fear that they’ll have to find honest work. There was a movie some time ago that opened with a marathon dance contest. After a certain length of time all the contestants were eliminated except one. Everybody had to fail except the winner. That’s what medical school has become. Since everybody can’t win, everybody suffers from a loss of self-esteem. Everybody comes out of medical school feeling bad. Doctors are given one reward for swallowing the fear pill so willingly and for sacrificing the healing instincts and human emotions that might help their practice: arrogance. To hide their fear, they’re taught to adopt the authoritarian attitude and demeanor of their professors."

-Dr. Robert Mendelsohn

So, as most of you know, what does Kailani do when she's at yet another crossroad?

....she makes a list.

Reasons To Do It:

1. I am demanding, selfish, narcissistic, enjoy stress and am high strung.

2. Lifelong dream

3. The drive

4. No longer possessing the fear of math and science

5. The fact that I am a massive over-achiever...no less than an A for me loves (with the exception of speech class).

6. Support (I believe my friends will support me in whatever I do).

7. I have the super-human ability to survive solely on eggo waffles, ramen (ray-men, get it right) noodles, microwaveable burritos, and string cheese.

8. I enjoy being alone. That'll come in handy when I there's those 48 hour studying sessions.

9. I can survive on 2-3 hours of sleep a night.

“The woods are lovely, dark, and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.”
~ Robert Frost

Reasons Not To Do It:

1. Money (but I think this may be a draw back for most pre-med students).

2. Time (am I too old? By the time I finish pre-med I'll be 25...I'll be 30 by med schools end! Then comes residency...).

3. The fear that my mind may change again. I really need a lot of push from friends and family if I want to do this.

So what I figure is:

If I go for this it will require me to:

1. Find other outlets for my MANY other interests so I can prevent myself from veering away from it. I guess I could use this blog and photoshop to satisfy my creative spirit because god knows there is no art found in the study of cardiac-pressure volume loops and the renin-angiotensi-aldosterone system. :)

2. I can continue working my present schedule at work, after all, it worked this past semester whilst taking a large amount of hours. Luckily, I work better under stress.

3. Summer classes, at the beginning of summer (May and June) I can work like mad then in July and August take a summer semester to get tougher classes out of the way.

4. Time, I guess that's all I have really, it'll be better to go at it now than to go at it next year...or 5 years from now.

Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer. Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack of harmony and proportion is more readily seen.”
~ Leonardo da Vinci

5. My major doesn't necessarily matter as long as I get the science classes in:

"Even as breakthroughs in science and advances in technology make the practice of medicine increasingly complex, medical educators are looking beyond biology and chemistry majors in the search for more well-rounded students who can be molded into caring and analytic doctors. The number of science majors applying to medical school has been steady for the past decade—about 65 percent of applicants major in biology or another physical science. What’s changing is who gets in."

~A quote from Newsweek.

...and apparently English majors perform better on the verbal reasoning section of the MCAT (duh!), so if I can do well in my maths and sciences and also in major classes (because they are of much interest to me) then wouldn't that be just perfection?

I now ask of all of you to please lend your opinion, words of wisdom, support or even your discouragement to my possible future as a med school applicant. (Please vote in the right column).

Thank you and goodbye.

"You owe it to us all to get on with what you’re good at.” ~W. H. Auden

If You Want Something In Life, Reach Out And Grab It

You Know You´re a Traveler When...

1. At least one item in your pack has been stitched, or otherwise fixed, with dental-floss.

2. You know, from experience, that a washboard is more than a musical instrument.

3. You can´t remember the last time you actually threw toilet paper into the toilet bowl, and give thanks to the all-mighty-bathroom-gods any time you find a toilet seat, warm water or water pressure.

4. You play the Russian-Roulette game of street food regularly. And win.

5. You have a 10-dollar camera and no music playing device or instrument. They were all stolen ages ago.

6. You know the difference between Amoebic Dysentery and Giardiasis and are able to communicate with the pharmacist to get any prescription-only drugs that you need --- without a prescription.

7. You have a variety of services at hand to offer in exchange for room & board or food and your experiences (within local community) doing such have been some of your richest.

8. You stop fawning over every passport stamp you get and start filling in the "Occupation" blanks on the the country admission visas with "Magician", "Philosopher" or "Nomad".

9. You know the difference between lice, bedbug, mite, spider, ant, bee, mosquito, love, and sand fly bites. You´ve had them all.

10. You no longer blink an eye at 16-year old boys carrying large automatic rifles. They are army personnel, police or bandits -- or any combination of the three.

11. You no longer convert every price to US dollars and say "Golly! What a deal! I´ll take three!". Instead you realize that it´s half your weekly wage and bargain the price with the merchant down to 1/3 the original quote.

12. You wouldn´t be caught dead with a fanny-pack or in shorts above the knee and don´t think twice about wearing the same pair of pants all week without washing.

13. For the rain season, you´ve given the rubber-boot to hoods, umbrellas and expensive-lined-Gortex-gear and instead opt for a tank top and quick-drying pants with drain holes in the pockets.

14. You´ve learned that oranges can be green, limes are lemons, you can find 20 different types of bananas at the market and that chili pepper DOES taste great on fruit -- especially unripe mango.

15. You know how to tie a hammock to a palm tree, a boat to a dock and your rucksack or surfboard to the rack of a car or bus.

16. You start cutting your hair with your Leather Man tool or give up on it all together and just start twisting it into dreads.

17. You know how to "slap" your fingers, cluck your tongue like the locals, whistle loud enough to get the driver´s attention from the back of the bus and "hisssss" to get your mate´s attention.

18. You´ve developed your more camel-like qualities. You are able to go without water and/or hold your bladder for 12 hours or more at a time (along with the locals) without having to beg the bus driver to pull over.

19. You´re thinking of making and wearing a name tag that answers the following questions: "Where are you from?" "How old are you?" "How long are you traveling?", "What did you do at home?" and "Do you have an rolling papers?".

20. You have sworn off sprays that include deet and drugs that end in "quine" because of their dangerous chemical composition, but have ventured to eat things you found on cow dung and smoke things that end in "juana" because of their natural composition.

21. You have mastered at least one of the following: juggling, jewelery making, fire eating, coconut carving, drumming, native dancing, card-playing, or some sort of street performing.

22. You´re completely Bob-Marleyed-Out.

23. IF you´re American, when people ask you where you are from, you hang your head red-and-shame-faced to locals or prep yourself for a battle with the "Ignorant and Arrogant" stereotype (which is mostly true) to international travelers.

24. The two words you fear most are "Inadequate Funds" and you actually KNOW your four-digit pin number to get a cash advance on your credit card (from the LAST time you had a 911 money emergency).

25. You know that your best adventures will always be found off your original path (but you hope that there isn´t an armed robber in the bushes alongside it).

Oh look! Tourist has emerged from the vendor mob! And look! He´s sporting an authentic hand-stitched Guatemalan hat. And doesn´t he look local now!

*glances at watch*

Isn´t it almost buffet time?

Love and Namaste,
~Kailani

P.S. I recommend seeing Into The Wild (Directed by Sean Penn, Book by John Krakauer, true story of Christopher McCandless' trip into the wild). Hands down one of if not THE best movie I've ever seen.

"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greather joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun." -- Chris McCandless

(last photo of him before his death)

Good Things: Crazy Sexy Yodeling Camel Band

The Top Twenty-Something Artists Of All Times (According To The Only Polynesian Princess You'll Ever Know.)

(songs are in no particular order, so in other words if you're an Ice Age Mike Jones fan and wanna hate cause Blues Traveler is at the top...don't worry, doesn't mean anything...but though...if you're say..a Linkin Park fan and wanna hate 'cause they didn't make the list...hate all you want, they suck.)

1. Blues Traveler
2. Counting Crows
3. U2
4. Cake
5. Lupe Fiasco
6. Joss Stone
7. I-Nine
8. Buffalo Springfield
9. Long Beach Dub Allstars
10. The Eagles
11. Kate Nash
12. Stereophonics
13. Rilo Kiley
14. Sara Bareilles
15. Marvin Gaye
16. Beastie Boys
17. Dave Matthews Band
18. John Fogerty
19. The Clash
20. Deep Dish
21. Dishwalla
22. Big Pun
23. Pimp C
24. Mike Jones
25. DJ AM
26. The Beatles
27. Toby Lightman
28. Ella Fitzgerald
29. Vanessa Paradis

Off To Ireland...

(Kilkenny, Ireland where I will be visiting)

So I'm off to Ireland early in the morning with Amber (meeting Sara in Dublin)! Forgive me if you're unable to get a hold of me over the next week, I'll be in transit most of the time! (Dublin-Belfast-Galway-Cork-Kilkenny)

Hope you all have a wonderful spring break!!! I'm going to miss all of you very much!!

Thank you to my family, C.J., Clint, and the boys for a perfect early birthday celebration tonight!!! I love you all so much!!!!!

I'll try to post a blog or two along the road with pictures! I'm also taking my video camera (which films in PAL unfortunately (bought it in Malaysia) so I have to convert all of my videos when I get back to NTSC...ugh). Well g'night! Slán agat!!!

Much love and Namaste,

~Kailani

I've finally rejected the preposterous notion of "perfect" and replaced it with "unique" in respect to my life.

One of the things I learned the hard way was that it doesn't pay to get
discouraged. Keeping busy and making optimism a way of life can restore your
faith in yourself.

....and my life starts now.

I pause now (but only for a moment, as I'm currently very busy ;-) ) to
reflect on the past few months and the distance I've felt I've come.

I've come from being the most negative, procrastinating, unfaithful human being to becoming a very positive, driven, motivated, faithful, (somewhat more than before) responsible, "going to live my dreams" god-loving person. I feel an energy that has taken over every bit of me, I have a fire that was before only a flicker. I still have the same dreams as before but now I'm working towards achieving them! I'm doing great in school and enjoying it more than ever before (yes! even math!), I walk off campus everyday feeling inspired, I go to work everyday knowing that every dollar I make is going towards some future accomplishment, I look forward every week to church and teaching Sunday school (whereas before I had very negative ideas about church I now can't get enough of the place and the people, the kids, the word, and just every freakin' thing that God has to offer me right now!).

When I sit here and think about the way I feel inside, the passion I have to help others, spread the word, achieve my dreams and help others achieve theirs, inspire, and love I can't help but just drop to my knees and cry, not tears of sadness but tears of total happiness! Though I still get stressed at times I've found postive ways to release my stress, like running, I've ran everyday for the past week and a half, or my yoga everynight, or studying, or just surrounding myself with the people I love so much, my friends and family.

In conclusion with inspiration from a friend and fellow traveler,

I chose my life. I choose my life. I take responsibility for all that has passed, is and will come to be. Under meditative investigation, all the qualities that fuel my self-pity and -hate, I find to have grown from -- rarely obvious but -- always altruistic reason. And I am so grateful; for my family, parents, friends, health, wealth and even my century and country; for all the work it took to tend the fields and ripen the circumstances into which I have chosen to have this life born. And I thank also this Life. For while I did choose it, it had the choice, and did not reject, but accepted my proposal. And I know, I know, I have a lot of my life contract yet to fulfill, and that all the care and love put into me, was done so in the faith that I would one day reflect back, and multiply that within, the mirror. And my signature, at the bottom of Life’s contract, also attests to my understanding that I will one day drop from its tree and die. And nourish the earth with this life’s sacrifice. So that I too, may take a turn at the fields, ripening the circumstances, for another’s birth.

So much love,~Kai!

(P.S. I leave in 5 days for Ireland.)

What is rooted is easy to nourish.

What is recent is easy to correct.

What is brittle is easy to break.

What is small is easy to scatter.

Prevent trouble before it arises.

Put things in order before they exist.

The giant pine tree grows from a tiny sprout.

The journey of a thousand miles starts from beneath your feet.

Rushing into action, you fail.

Trying to grasp things, you lose them.

Forcing a project to completion, you ruin what was almost ripe.

Therefore the Master takes action by letting things take their course.

He remains as calm at the end as at the beginning.

He has nothing, thus has nothing to lose.

What he desires is non-desire; what he learns is to unlearn.

He simply reminds people of who they have always been.

He cares about nothing but the Tao.

Thus he can care for all things.

(if you want to go see this picture on Flickr with all the notes please go to Contents of Kailani's Life)

None But Jesus

In the quiet, in the stillness
I know that You are God
In the secret of Your presence
I know there I am restored

When You call I won’t refuse
Each new day again I’ll choose

There is no one else for me
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

In the chaos, in confusion
I know You’re Sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will

When You call I won’t delay
This my song through all my days

All my delight is in You Lord
All of my hope, all of my strength
All my delight is in You Lord Forevermore

Season of the Fool

(Tioman Island, Malaysia, I've been scuba diving here!!)



"He will cease from what is base and frivolous in his life, and be content with all places and with any service he can render. He will calmly front the morrow in the negligence of that trust which carries God with it, and so hath already the whole future in the bottom of his heart.

The conditions are hard but equal. Thou shalt leave the world, and know the muse only. Thou shalt not know any longer the times, customs, graces, politics or opinions of men, but shalt take all from the muse. For the time of towns is tolled from the world by funeral chimes, but in nature the universal hours are counted by succeeding tribes of animals and plants and by growth of joy on joy. The world is full of renunciations and apprenticeships, and this is thine; thou must pass for a fool, and a churl for a long season. And this is the reward; that the ideal shall be real to thee, and the impressions of the actual world shall fall like summer rain, copious, but not troublesome, to thy invulnerable essence."

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

(Kuching, Sarawak, East Malaysia (Sarawak River) where I used to live.)

Traveling is sacred; mankind has traveled ever since the dawn of time, in search of hunting and grazing ground, or milder climates. Very few men manage to understand the world without leaving their home towns. When you travel - and I am not speaking of tourism, but of the solitary experience of a journey - four important things occur in your life:

a] one is in a different place, so the protective barriers no longer exist. To begin with this can be alarming, but soon one gets used to it and starts understanding how many interesting things there are beyond the walls of one's garden.

b] since solitude can be great and oppressive, one is more open to people one would not normally exchange a single word with, back home - waiters, other travelers, hotel staff, the passenger in the next seat in the bus.

c] one starts depending on others for everything: finding a hotel, buying something, knowing how to catch the next train. One begins to realize that there is nothing wrong with depending on others - on the contrary, it is a blessing.

d] one speaks in a language one doesn't understand, uses money whose worth one does not know, and wanders down streets for the very first time. One knows the old I, with all it learned, is completely useless in the face of these new challenges - and begins discovering that, buried deep down in one's unconscious, there is something far more interesting, adventurous, open to the world and to new experiences.

(Sarawak, Borneo Highlands, near where I used to live.)

"To travel is the experience of ceasing to be the person you are trying to be, and becoming the person you really are."

Much love and Namaste.

Getting Political - State of the Union Address 2008

Yes. Yes. Indeed I cannot refrain any longer, I must in fact "get political".

On Monday afternoon, whitehouse.gov, our one-stop shopping site for neutral-colored residences, posted this important update on the proceedings:
“President Bush will deliver his State of the Union address on January 28, 2008. Whatever the form, content, delivery method or broadcast medium, the President’s annual address is a backdrop for national unity.”

My guesses — and please bear in mind that I am neither pundit nor a smart person — were (my assumptions previous to the speech were as follows):

Form: Macaroni collage

Content: In-depth analysis of monumentally important human-animal hybrid controversy

Delivery Method: Ice Cream Truck

Broadcast Medium: Tin cans, string

So the speech wasn't so bad. Delivery was decent, his skills have in fact, yep I'm saying it, improved! I think he's trying to leave us on perhaps a "good note" with the impression that he is trying to make positive changes in our economy, national security, global war on terror, education system (No Child Left Behind), health care, immigration, etc., but I fear it's too late for his "attempts to change for the better" to win over American's hearts and minds. No coasting into finish for Dubya. But here is a summary of his speech:

Form: Speech

Content: Economic stuff, Incentive stuff, Legacy stuff

Delivery Method: Mouth

Broadcast Medium: TV

Truly, the address was a firm, sure-footed and resounding proclamation that even our 43rd president himself was surprised he had to do another of these things.

9:06: The President arrives, fashionably late, and fashionably attired in a blue tie the exact shade of America’s current malaise. After much hand-shaking, he takes his place at the rostrum, in front of Dick Cheney, a human-zombie hybrid, and Nancy Pelosi, a human-woman hybrid.

9:07: Bush gets down to business right away, talking about the economy, his stimulus plan, etc. Obviously, he’s saving human-animal hybrids for later in the speech.

9:12: Tax relief. No mention of how human-animal hybrids could affect it.

9:22: Human-alcohol hybrid Ted Kennedy checks his program, trying to figure out who the guy in the blue tie behind the podium is, and if there’s an intermission.

9:29: “I call on Congress to ban unethical practices such as…” This is it! “…the buying, selling, patenting, or cloning of human life.” Human-animal hybrids, here we —
Um. Hello? He’s just moved on to “matters of justice.” Matters of justice!? How about the injustice of not discussing human-animal hybrids?!

9:30: Okay, now I'm ticked.

9:33: America is responding to immigration by “deploying fences.” If we had human-animal hybrids, we could line them up along the Mexican border. They would be dangerous, yet understanding. Does nobody see this?

9:40: Iraq.

9:53: Iran.

9:55: Wiretapping.

10:00: Wow. He’s really not even going to mention them.

10:01: “…And the state of our union will remain strong.” “God bless America.”

Yes, we’re a little shocked right now.

But in a way, I'm almost glad President Bush didn’t discuss human-animal hybrids in this year’s State of the Union. Perhaps he understood that, with only one year left, they’re simply too big for him to take on. (Some are, quite literally. Especially if the human is tall to begin with, and then the animal it’s fused with is like a rhino or a blue whale.)
We look forward to next year, when the State of the Union is delivered by someone else. Someone more attuned to the plight of the human-animal. Maybe a centaur.

Thank you Topical Satire Initiative.

Okay now go watch his speech if you missed it at: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2008/01/20080128-13.wm.v.html

and read these numbers:

The Real State of the Union 2008 By the Numbers

Number of Americans living in poverty in 2001: 31.6 million

Number of Americans living in poverty in 2008: 36.5 million

Percentage increase in home foreclosures, November 2006-December 2007: 68%

Yearly average number of new private sector jobs created from 1992-2000: 1.76 million

Yearly average number of new private sector jobs created from 2001-2008: 369,000
Average price of a gallon of gasoline on January 3, 2000: $1.59

Average price of a gallon of gasoline on January 7, 2008: $3.14

Forget Cloverfield, where were our warnings before this one? ;)

It was my pleasure.

Extra! Extra! Read All About It!

(Inisheer on Aran Island, Ireland)

Have some new and exciting news for everyone!!! Amber is coming to Ireland with me! She bought her ticket tonight (and managed to get seats next to me the whole way!) YAY! Sara is also coming over from England to meet us in Dublin!! YAY! Wow! I am so excited! I know we will have the best time ever! I promised Amber that if she comes to Ireland with me that I'll get a shamrock tattoo, so now that her ticket is bought it's my turn to get a tattoo! YAY! haha! So now I just need to save, save, save!!!

(Irish Castle)

(new tattoo?)

The Pursuit of Happiness

(Forty shades of green...the Irish countryside. Kilkenny, Ireland.)

The ticket has been booked! It's non-refundable...so no backing out of this one! I leave on March 1st from Nashville (have an 8 hour layover in Chicago) and arrive in Dublin, Ireland on March 2nd at 8:35am! I will return home on March 8th. I know, I know....you all voted otherwise, most of yas on South America, but I could not find a ticket under $1,000 to any location in SA plus I saw P.S. I Love You this week (with my ladies: CJ, Kelly, and Dusty....cried like mad!) and it inspired me to go!

YAYYYY! I am so excited, beyond words, sooo excited! My friend Courtney went to Ireland last year and she is making a list of places for me to visit, I'd like to spend most of my time in the country-side, though I am visiting both Dublin and Belfast. I'm staying at hostels and couchsurfing is a possibility (see http://www.couchsurfing.com/). Are you all excited for me? Hopefully I'll meet a sexy lepruchaun to show me around :-) or Gerard Butler or Jeffrey Dean Morgan (though he's actually Scottish) (see http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0431308/).

In other news! I watched Juno with Kelly on Monday!! One of the best movies I've ever seen! Also, I am back in school now and busy as ever!!!! I have school three days a week, work three days a week and then am about to start teaching sunday school with Kelly, have church, and community group on Sunday's! My life is really busy right now and I love every bit of it! I love staying busy, I feel so responsible and somewhat proud of myself, not only for work, school, and church but for also in a way...finding my way and having the courage to finally book a trip off on my own! I get to put that expensive Gregory Palisade backpack to good use now (see right-hand picture)!!! :-)

Okay, I'll stop bragging on myself now. I must go study for my math quiz tomorrow and get some shut eye.

With undefended love.

(Cliffs of Moher, Ireland)

Uttanasana and New Beginnings

(this photo is of the salt flats aka Salar de Uyuni in Bolivia)

Bonne année everyone!! Hope everyone had a wonderful and safe new years! I went to CJ and Clint's house for a friendly gathering, played Scene It (us girls beat the boys, yes I know my Nicholas Cage but apparently not my Michael Palin whom I had just finished watching a documentary literally 3 hours before the question!) Anyways, we also played Wii boxing and bowling, my arms have killed since! It was wonderful to be with my closest friends, I had a great time!

Also, I was lucky enough to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra from like the 7th row (it snowed on us!) on Sunday night thanks to Clint and CJ who knows the tour manager and offered Dusty and I two of their tickets. I have to say it was THE best concert I've ever been to! Thank you two so much! I love you both. This Sunday I start community bible study! Also, this Sunday we are celebrating CJ's birthday! Happy early Birthday CJ!

This week I've taken some big steps toward making my trip a reality, I put more money into my savings and also started an IRA (yes it's a retirement account but I'm investing in a medium-risk mutual fund which hopefully will make me some money rather than lose it!).

I've also started an exercise regiment, I try my best to run everyday, I've started with a mile and am building up to 5 to 6 miles! I also do yoga every night before I head to bed, it's incredibly relaxing! After I do it I feel so calm and peaceful, after reading about 5 pages I passed out and slept great! I feel really good all day the following day too! Today I received the always precious compliment that I looked "skinny", I love it.

I've looked into taking a little "pre-trip" this spring break! I feel the need to gauge my travel capabilities and have found a few prices on flights at the beginning of March to Ireland and South America. If I don't go to Ireland to explore (both North and South) then I'd like to fly into Buenos Aires and head down to Patagonia (well, Punta Arenas) for a week of hiking around the glaciers and Ushuaia! What do you all think? I've found some cheap prices and I think it'll not only satisfy my eagerness and impatience to travel (for a little while at least!) but help me understand my limits, I'll be staying in hostels and traveling as cheaply as possible.

I received a lot of great comments on my previous blog, after work tomorrow I'll try to reply to them all! Thank you all so much for your input, I love to see that people are reading my blog and those experienced travelers are sharing their information with me (Adam, Steve, etc.) as I'm totally clueless when it comes to all of this stuff! Yay for comments! Yay for travel! Yay for flippin' life! =) I'm truly blessed.

Well I'm off now to do some yoga and get some shut eye, I've made a promise to my 11 o'clock buddies at work that I'd make an appearance (in other words work 11-8 with them)!

Much love and Namaste my friends.




(lengthening in yoga, I can dooo it!)

Cinnamon, The Silent Killer

(this photo is of the Wakhan Valley on the border between Tajikistan and Afghanistan...the snow capped mountains you see are in Afghanistan.)

I've taken the entire day off and feel as if I haven't accomplished a thing! I've looked at about 3000 pictures of places in the Middle East and read country profiles on most countries that I'd like to visit in the Middle East, but that's about it (oh and took a 3 hour nap). You're probably wondering...the Middle East? Okay so I've changed my route around somewhat from what it was before:

Less of Europe, only Iceland, Ireland, Scotland, England, Wales, Poland, and Ukraine.

Then into Russia, overland through Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan, and Tajikistan, Mongolia and then down through China.

Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Malaysia, Thailand, Burma, India, Nepal, Oman, Yemen, Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Israel, Syria (of course all the while avoiding an Israeli passport stamp...as Syria and a few other countries dislike proof that you've been to Israel, so much they'll reject you from entering their country). Iran (possibility, I know your thinking I'm crazy but apparently it's quite safe (I'm trying to leave aside my preconceptions and go with an open mind)), then to Turkey, Egypt, Kenya, Uganda, Tanzania, Mozambique (scuba!), Zimbabwe, Botswana, South Africa then home.

Don't doubt that this itinerary will change again, it will! haha I'm learning more and more about these countries, what they have to offer, safety, etc.. everyday from sites and people who've been, so don't be suprised when it changes.

Anyways! This itinerary makes me happy! I really want to see the biblical/historical sites the ME has to offer and I want to volunteer at Nakuru Orphanage in Kenya. More volunteer stops along the way are a possibility as is the possibility of me somehow getting over to NZ, a friends recent trip there (photos/experiences) has nearly persuaded me into going.

You are all probably wondering why I want to skip so much of Europe, Australia, and South America....I'd like to save some of the world for future trips (no I don't plan on stopping after this one). I'd like to do Europe as a seperate trip all together as well as SA and Aussie. I'd like to walk the Santiago De Compostela in Spain and France as part of a seperate trip to Europe later in the future.

Europe is also extremely expensive in comparison to Africa, SE Asia and the ME, as I will be on a major budget on this trip I'd like to see as much as possible for as cheap as possible.

As for cinnamon being the silent killer....I attempted to eat a teaspoon of cinnamon on Thursday as part of a dare with some friends....bad...bad idea. I am sick...so I can't breathe through my nose and cinnamon is dry so it clogs up your airway/esophagus so needless to say it sucked. Couldn't breathe so I had to spit it all out, all the while it's coming out of my nose and wouldn't have been suprised if it wasn't coming out of my eyes and ears as well, I didn't know what was happening! haha. I was a sight to see let me tell ya. Don't ever think for one minute after watching a You Tube video of a full grown man spitting the crap out 'cause he was unable to do it...that he is a pussy and that you can accomplish what he couldn't....you probably can't. At least I tried though and now I know.

Oh and I get to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra tomorrow!! Thanks to Clint and CJ!!! I'm so excited, I am going with them and Dusty! YAY! =) Lucky me!!!

Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!!! I got money for Christmas that went directly into my savings account (oh and to Amazon.com towards a few new books!....and a sweater and tobogan from Free People clothing! =) )

Namaste my friends, more details on the trip to come soon, I promise.

(the Wakhan valley again below.)

Merry Christmas!

Hello everyone, I just wanted to wish you a very Merry Christmas.

Church was incredible today! Brought tears to my eyes. Everyone lit candles as the lights were turned off and sang Silent Night, it was beautiful!!! I bought Ring The Bells today, the CD (see to the right, the music is playing and there is a link to where you can buy the CD), all proceeds go to African Missions. I just bought 3 more copies online to send to family members. It's an incredible CD. The church I go to, Fellowship Bible went to Africa and have incorporated the sounds of Africa along with the voices of regular worship leaders from our church creating an amazing CD that'll inspire you and definitely get you into the Christmas spirit.

"And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch of their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will for all the people.Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord." ~Luke 2:8-11

I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas.

In his name with undefended love.

Swamped

Sorry I didn't write my daily Sunday blog everyone! I've been, well, swamped! I've had so much to do this week, between work, church, Christmas parties, present buying and sleep (what little I could manage to get), I've been unable to sit down to work out a good blog. It's been a good week, I was able to get in a lot of work and make a lot of money (which is going going gone...thank you Christmas). I was only able to get 30 minutes of sleep on Saturday night, on Sunday I had church (which was great, might I add, Lloyd Shadrach spoke and he is so animated and inspirational!), after church I went to a community bible study group lunch (yum, CJ catered with Cracker Barrel!), met a lot of new, really nice people! Sunday evening I managed to fall asleep watching The Clockwork Orange (disturbing but artistically amazing). This week I have 2 parties to go to, 3 days of work and then I leave for Kentucky on Saturday (then comes Christmas week....family stuff and work)! *sigh* Well I'm off again to a Christmas party. I promise I'll try to find some time to sit and write, hopefully this week. Much Love and Namaste my friends.

Eager Feet

(thanks again to sol for the visual aid!)

“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream.” -"The Alchemist" Paulo Coelho

So as I continue to plan and learn new things everyday I'm conceptualizing or envisioning what this impending "new face of reality" will be like once the time comes (when I set off). As I move along (at a brisk pace...I put my car up for sale yesterday! I paid all $3,000 in tuition for school this week, I start on Jan. 14th!!!), I'm starting to realize what it's going to take from me to both make this trip a reality and make it through the actual trip, here's what I've come up with:

Passion: I've always struggled with being able to stay focused on one dream (I have so many!) and in turn enabling it to come true. If things go as planned then my passion will remain strong and further be fueled to make this dream a reality.

“I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” - Jimmy Dean

Courage: To be strong, stay strong and not let my fears get the best of me.

"Pitiful is the person who is afraid of taking risks. Perhaps this person will never be disappointed or disillusioned; perhaps she wont suffer the way people do when thay have a dream to follow. But when that person looks back - and at some point everyone looks back - she will hear her heart saying," "What have you done with the miracles of God planted in your days? What have you done with the talents God have bestowed on you? You buried yourself in a cave because you were fearful of losing those talents. So this is you heritage: the certainty that you wasted your life."
"Pitiful are the people who must realize this." "Because when they are finally able to believe in miracles, their life's magic moments will have already passed them by."
- Paulo Coelho

Endurance: Waking up everyday with the intentions to make my dream come true and knowing that all obstacles are transitory on the road to my rainbow.

"The universe always helps us fight for our dreams, no matter how foolish they may be. Our dreams are our own, and only we can know the effort required to keep them alive."
- "By The River Piedra, I Sat Down & Wept" Paulo Coelho

Independence: Remain independent, allow myself only to focus on my life and how I can be a better and more generous person. The only relationship I want is one with myself and God as far as matters of the heart go. I too often let love keep me from pursuing my destiny, recently I've come to the realization that if love causes me to abandon my destiny then it was never true love.

"All deep, earnest thinking is but the intrepid effort of the soul to keep the open independence of her sea; while the wildest winds of heaven and earth conspire to cast her on the treacherous, slavish shore." - Herman Melville

Self-Dependency: Though I know I must have some sense of this before I go, I know that along the way this will strengthen and solidify.

"You might find yourself adverse to old ideas of finding someone else to “complete yourself" and instead find a new passionate relationship with life that fills an emptiness that you may have once misidentified." - Sol

Everyday God gives us the sun - and also one moment in which we have the ability to change everything that makes us unhappy. Every day, we try to pretend that we haven't perceived that moment, that it doesn't exist - that today is the same as yesterday and will be the same as tomorrow. But if people really pay attention to their everyday lives, they will discover that magic moment. It may arrive in the instant when we are doing something mundane, like putting our front-door key in the lock; it may lie hidden in the quiet that follows the lunch hour or in the thousand and one things that all seem the same to us. But that moment exists - a moment when all the power of the stars becomes a part of us and enables us to perform miracles.

Joy is sometimes a blessing, but it is often a conquest. Our magic moment helps us to change and sends us off in search of our dreams. Yes, we are going to suffer, we will have difficult times, and we will experience many disappointments - but all of this is transitory; it leaves no permanent mark. And one day we will look back with pride and faith at the journey we have taken.


I feel like right now I am totally surrounded by inspiration, it's in the books I read, the travelouges I come across, the friends surrounding me, the family I love so much, it's in the words, actions, and emotions of those new people I meet or chance upon and even in those I know so well. It's pouring from the heavans above. I feel so blessed and am so thankful for everything in my life and hope that I can learn, be further inspired, and experience new things through travel and use that knowledge, inspiration and experience to help others.

Namaste my friends (I honor the Spirit in you which is also in me).

(Now, off to plan while I conquer the largest mug of hot tea ever made!!! *smile*)

P.S. Oh yeah and a small cheer for Dusty and I, we completed Discovery 2 (somewhat of a membership program about the church covering topics such as worship, community, growth, service, and generosity that lasted 4 weeks). YAY for us! Go Fellowship Bible!!!

Animals are wonderful.